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red-neck  (r1d1n1k1) n. Offensive Slang

A collection of common redneck terms and usage from the southerner's dictionary.

First Half

HALE: Where General Sherman is going for what he did to Etlanna. (Atlanta) Usage:"General Sherman said "War is Hale" and he made sure it was."

HAZE: - a contraction.
Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah ... haze ignert."

HEAVY DEW: - phrase. A request for action.
Usage: "Kin I heavy dew me a favor?"

HEIDI - (noun) - Greeting.

HEP: to aid or benefit.
Usage:"Ah can't hep it if Ah'm still in love with you."

HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
Usage: "Heidi, Hire yew?"

HOD: - adverb. Not easy.
Usage: "A broken hot is hod to fix."

HOT: - noun. A blood-pumping organ.

IDINIT: Term employed by genteel Southerners to avoid saying "Ain't".
Usage:"Mighty hot today, idinit?"

IGNERT: - adjective. Not smart. See "Auburn Alumni."
Usage: "Them N-C-TWO-A boys sure are ignert!"

IMPOTENT: Distinguished, well known.

INTERNET: Where cafeteria workers put their hair

JAWJUH: - noun. A highly flammable state just north of Florida.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjah bard my pickup truck." JEW: Did you.
"Jew want to buy attair comic book, son, or just stand there and read it here?"

JU-HERE: - a question.
Usage: "Juhere that former Dallas Cowboys' coach Jimmy Johnson recently toured the University of Alabama?"

KUMPNY: Guests. "Be home on time.
Usage:“We's havin' kumpny for supper."

LAW: Police, or as Southerners pronounce it, PO-leece.
Usage:"We better get outta here. That bartender's doen called the law."

LIKKER: Whiskey; either the amber kind bought in stores or the homemade white kind that federal authorities frown upon.
Usage:"Does he drink? Listen, he spills more likker than most people drink.'

LOT: - adjective. Luminescent.
Usage: "I dream of Jeanie in the lot-brown hair."

MASH: To press, as in the case of an elevator button.
Usage:"Want me to mash yo floor for you, Ma'am?"

MODEM: What ya did when the grass and weeds got too tall.

MORBID: A higher bid at the auction.

MOUSE PAD: Where Mickey and Minnie live

MUCHABLIJE: Thank you.
Usage:"Muchablige for the lift, mister."

MUNTS: - noun. A calendar division.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I aint herd from him in munts."

NAWTHUN: Anything that is not Southern.
Usage:"He is a classic product of the superior Nawthun educational system." (sarcasm)

NETWORK: Scoop’n up a big fish before it breaks the line

NODE: Was aware of; to know about something

ONLINE: Where to stay when taking the sobriety test

OVAIR: In that direction.
Usage:"Where's yo paw, son?" He's ovair, suh."

PACKET: What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a trip.

PHRAISIN: Very cold.
Usage:"Shut that door. It's phraisin in here."

PLUMB: Completely, Entirely.
Usage:"Ah'm plum wore out."

RATS: - noun. Entitled power or privilege.
Usage: "We Southerners are willing to fight for our rats." (Today's Southern Word comes from a school teacher in America's southern most state: Hawaii. As part of her class's study of the "War of Northern Aggression" (known to Yankees as the "Civil War"), she showed her class the movie Gettysburg. The students wondered why the Confederacy was fighting for their "rats." The answer, of course, is obvious: Southerners have very friendly rats ... in fact, you could almost say that we have some downright civil rats.)

RANCH: - noun. A tool.
Usage: "I think I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

REBOOT: What you do when the first pair gets covered with barnyard stuff.

RETARD: - Verb. To stop working.
Usage: "My granpaw retard at age 65."

RETCH: To grasp for.
"The right feilder retch over into the stands and caught the ball."

SAAR: The opposite of sweet.
Usage:"These pickles Sure are saar."

SCSI: A name for 2 week old underwear.

SEED: - verb, past tense
Usage:“Deed you seed what that gurl deed to him?”

SHOVELAY: A vehicle made by general motors.
"Nobody could drive a Shovelay like Junior Johnson."

SINNER: Exact middle of.
"Have you been to the new shoppin' sinner."

SQUARSH: - noun. A vegetable (also verb - to flatten).

SUGAR: A kiss.
Usage:"Come here and give me some sugar."

TAR: - noun. A rubber wheel.
Usage: "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh doesn't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

TAR ARM: A tool employed in changing wheels.
Usage:"You cain't change a tar without a tar arn."

TARRED: - adverb. Exhausted.
Usage: "I just flew in from Hot-lanta, and boy my arms are tarred."

THANK - (verb) - Cognitive process.
Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."

TIRE: - noun. A tall monument.
Usage: "Lord willing and the creeks don't rise, I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

TUMOR: More than one

URINE: Opposite of you're out

UHMURIKA /UHMURIKIN: Someone who lives int he United States of Uhmurika. Usage:"Thomas Jefferson was a great Uhmurikin."

VARICOSE VEINS: Veins that are very close together

VIEW: - contraction: verb and pronoun.
Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City."

WAR: Metal strands attached to posts to enclose domestic animals.
Usage:"Be careful and don't get stuck on that bob war."

WARSH: - verb. To clean.
Usage: "Warsh that squarsh, Bubba ... you don't know where its been!"

WHUP: To beat or to strike.
Usage:"OOOEEE!!! Yer mama's gonna whup you fer sayin' a cuss word."

YANKEE SHOT: A Southern child's navel.
Usage:"Momma, what's this on mah belly?" "That's yo Yankee Shot."

ZAT: Is that.
Usage:"Zat yo dawg?"

Designated Driver, too drunk too drive, dog drives

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